Do you remember the old saying, you only get 1 chance to make a first impression? Well when it comes to online dating profiles for men, this saying is golden. Not following this advice, and you might as well be following the golden calf.
Just like dressing up in a sharp Anine Bing Tee before an interview for your dream job, you’ve got to make sure you dress that profile up to maximize your chances of success. The first impression either gets your foot in the door, or the door slamming shut on you. By avoiding these 7 deadly sins of online dating, you can find your way to the holy land of success.
#1. Thou Shall Not Be Directly Lustful
Any Neanderthal can type some sexual promises online. Heck, you could have even copy and pasted it from the net. You can’t prove anything much here, and the girls know that.
Being overly sexual in your profile simply won’t pay off. Being subtle about it will. The vast majority of normal girls will be instantly turned off by a lack of tact, or crude remark. Instead use subtle innuendo. Be suggestive, without being obvious.
Most girls have a fun, playful, sexual side. But as the man it’s your job to smoothly lead them so they can bring it out naturally. There is nothing smooth about saying you’re a sex master in the bedroom, or well endowed. However, mentioning that you’re “the dominant type, should the situation arise…”, is suitably playful, and puts her imagination to work for you.
#2. Thou Shall Not Indulge in Consumer Gluttony
The worst offenders are usually going into dozens, even hundreds of their favorite television programs, films, bands, you name it. What people don’t quite realize is this is unlikely give you extra leverage with a girl. When you consider the thousands of films, bands and television programs out there, you’re more likely going to come across as a spectator. Instead, be a participant.
A better bet is to pick 1 or 2. Then move on to things you actually do or create yourself. Resist getting carried away with great detail. By alluding to the air of mystery, you allow the girl to naturally find out more later. Remember it’s a dating website, not your autobiography! Save it for during the date when you can more easily gauge whether she’s even interested in hearing about it!
#3. Thou May Be Selective, But Not Too Selective
Wait…what happened to Greed? Although some may argue on this point, it really comes down to the type of game you want to play here. By dictating your preferences you can demonstrate you have standards and can screen for certain types of girl. But too much could dramatically decrease your response rate.
You risk shooting yourself in the foot before you even know what’s up. Many girls will actually disqualify themselves from messaging you, feeling they may not live up to your expectations. Even girls who you would love to meet could have their egos bruised and drift by without you even knowing.
A better approach is to create a more open profile which addresses a broad variety of girls. This will without a doubt increase the amount of messages and replies you receive. Now feel free to filter through and be as picky as you want.
#4. Thou Shalt Not Ramble
Slothful, sloppy writing isn’t a sin, but as far as online dating is concerned, it should be.
“I’m a teacher from London and I really like animals; I once went swimming with dolphins in Florida, I also adopted a seal over there and get photos of him all the time. I have two cats called George and Fluffy that would love to meet you. I think the best programme on T.V is scrubs… I see myself as JD the main character because he’s got a great imagination and likes to have fun, also I like that him and Turk are such great friends. Oh yeah, I happen to be a master at making Paella, which is from Spain by the way, drop me a message if you want to try it”
What a waffler…
It’s a shame because although he’s clearly trying, the effect only creates a parody of what an online dating profile should look like. Lucky for you he’s the martyr of online dating, sacrificing himself so you don’t have to…
#5. Thou Shalt Not be Wrathful
How often do you find yourself reading over girls’ profiles then marveling in admiration at the fact they hate most guys, cuss like sailors, or dislike the very things that other people seem to enjoy?
Unless by some bizarre coincidence you do in fact share all these traits, I’m going to take an educated guess and say never!
Does it entice you when you see; ‘all guys are the same, they just want to get in my pants’?
Yeah I thought as much…
Those are just a few examples of unattractive or negative information you might come across in profiles… So ensure you don’t do the same with your profile!
#6. Thou Shall Not Act Try Hard
Envy is the source of overcompensation. Those guys who go on and on about their abs and biceps, their fat wallet or their flashy car don’t get very far on online dating sites. The few results they do get will be nothing like the good quality girl you want to attract. Acting so try hard and bragging will result in many girls thinking your compensating for something – personality or otherwise…
But you do happen to have that killer body, bursting wallet or pimped out car then act a little more humble in your profile. You can certainly use subtle hints within your profile which instead lead the girl’s imagination. When she discovers things for herself along the way you will rightfully seem more natural and genuine.
#7. Thou Shall Not Upload Shirtless Selfies
Ah…Pride. Whatever you do, don’t commit this cardinal sin. You’re not modelling for a men’s fitness magazine, and the majority of girls will roll their eyes in disbelief. You will restrict yourself to a much smaller pool of girls who actually respond to this approach.
Ok Ok. You have hand crafted your beach body and want to reap some rewards? Well, there is a right way to do it. You can still show off your body without looking like a tool by being more subtle and keeping it natural. For example, a shot of you playing beach volleyball with friends. Basically any situation where having your top off is normal and the photo seems natural.
So just to clarify…Standing alone in front of a mirror whilst flexing and taking a picture is in no way natural at all.
Avoiding these 7 deadly sins will keep your soul clean, and out of trouble when crafting your online dating profile.
Want professional help? Personal Dating Assistants specializes in dating profiles for men. Call Personal Dating Assistants now at 1-800-344-6794 for a free consultation.
- Show Don’t Tell – Dating & What to Write - June 5, 2014
- 7 Deadly Sins of Online Dating Profiles for Men - May 4, 2014
- “If He’s Such A Catch, Why Does He Need an Online Dating Profile?” - April 21, 2014