If you’ve tried online dating in the US, then you already know the rules;
- fierce competition
- significant time commitment
- better bring your A game
But to play the international dating game overseas? Gentlemen, this is a different ballgame…
With that in mind, here’s 8 quick tips to keep in mind when writing your international dating profile, and crafting messages to exotic sirens overseas:
- Research the Biggest Dating Websites for Your County
When it comes to choosing an international dating site in a foreign country, size matters. As men, leverage your natural advantage, and play the numbers. Go by quantity of available prospects. Not quality. The reason being, online dating for men is first & foremost a numbers game. Yes, you still need to have your profile in order, introduction strategy down pat, and a game plan for follow up. But if you’re not working your magic on the biggest dating site in your chosen foreign country, you’re not going to have access to enough prospects, or receive enough profile views to make your getaway a smashing success.
- Learn to Spot Scammers
Don’t be fooled by international dating websites with pictures of airbrushed models, or flashy chat bubble pop ups. These are always scams. There is no such thing as mail order brides. Instead, use the websites where the women have a more realistic look, and with lots of them. That said, the more popular Russian, Ukrainian and other Eastern European dating sites will be harder to spot the difference, as women having studio glamour shots taken there is a bit of a national past time. But if you invest proper time on these sites, you will learn to spot the difference between professional photos, and professional money extractors. Hint: Is she posing in front of a car, boat, or airplane? If so, imagine the sucker behind the camera. Don’t be that guy. Let some other chump provide lifestyle pictures for that ex Russian brides future internet dating profile.
- From a Rich Western Country? Lead With That.
This is your trump card. As such, be sure to plaster it all over your dating profile. Put it in your username, the first sentence of your “about me”, and the first line of your opening message. “CaliforniaTraveler”, who is “Traveling to Russia on business” writes, “Hey Anna, I’m arriving from the US next week. Maybe you know a nice cafe, with fast internet and strong cappuccino? Just promise you won’t laugh at my American accent ;)”
There will be enough of a language barrier with most women right off the bat, so the cheesier, and more obvious the references to the good ‘ol US of A, the better.
- Compliments are ok!
On American dating sites, beginning your introduction with a physical compliment won’t earn you points from the more attractive women. Internationally however, you will get more “thank you”‘s and smiles. You’ll still need to make engaging follow up statements to move the interaction along. But it’s nice to know that outside the Western world, attractive women can still appreciate being told they’re pretty, without taking it for granted. Or worse, as a sign of thirst.
- Smart Talker? Dumb it down.
This isn’t the Anglosphere where you have to be funny, charming and witty just to get a response. All you need to do, is be from a wealthy Western country, have some decent looking dating pictures, and put in a real effort. Using big $5 dollar words, references to American TV, music or movies, and most Western style humor will be lost on this audience. One approach we like to employ at Personal Dating Assistants, is to write like a curious child in our overseas correspondence. You don’t need to show off. You’re already perceived as a wealthy, intelligent master of the universe to many of these women as a western man. From here, it’s simply a matter of relating to her beyond this stereotype. Keep it light and playful. But above all, keep it simple.
- 6. Ask for Her Preferred Method of Offline Communication
American girls by-and-large communicate via regular txt messaging. Overseas however, you never know if the girl you’re corresponding with has a proper txt plan. There’s a good chance instead that she uses Whatsapp, Viber, Skype, or a bajillion other apps for her day-to-day communicating. So ask her what she uses, and hit her up there.
Also, a surprising number of foreign young women will be happy to engage in an old fashioned voice chat with you, over phone or Skype. Compare this to American girls, where answering a phone call from a guy she met online is growing rarer and rarer these days. You can use voice chat to make her laugh, turn her on, or build a more genuine connection, if your phone game is tight.
- Video chat trumps all
If the international girl you’ve been messaging with has both Skype, and a webcam, then it’s worth pulling out all the stops to get her on video chat. Our members who do a video chat before the in-person date report a higher rate of success overseas than those who don’t.
It’s almost as if a video chat serves as the 1st date. You get the awkward ‘first meet’ out of the way virtually, so by the time you meet up in person, there’s already a level of comfort between you, because you know what each other looks like, how you communicate together, and what to expect. Not to mention, it can be a real time saver if you’re dealing with a catfish, secret internet fatty, or insurmountable language barrier. It’s better to cut bait before discovering these issues, live & in person.
- You Reap What You Sow
If you fail to prepare, prepare to fail. Make sure you begin your overseas pipelining efforts at a bare minimum of 1 week before your scheduled trip. Longer than that is ok too, if you can afford the time.
International online dating, like domestic, still requires a significant time & energy investment. Depending on the country, it can be similar level of effort, or easier, but always with nuanced differences. For guys who need professional online dating help, or are just too busy, outsourcing to a Personal Dating Assistant might make sense. We yank you off those scammy mail order bride services, and make real Russian women excited to date you. But if you follow these 8 tips, you’ll be 1 step ahead of your competition.
An attraction technologist at heart, he travels the world in search of beautiful women, new ways to help men with their online dating, and the perfect single malt whiskey.
His column runs Tuesdays.
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