“World Traveller, Hustler Ambition”
Photos: Corset Boots and Lingerie
Personality: Dark, Ominous
Talking to girls online can be terrifying.
Have you ever read a mean girls profile and thought…”I have no idea what to say”?
Well, you’re not alone. Sensitive women often have aggressive profiles. They use it as a defensive mechanism, to protect themselves. But also as a screening tool, to weed out weaker men, while hoping a guy with a thick skin and sense of humor will persevere.
Talking to girls online who act like this can be a challenge. But you can usually glean key information from her profile:
“I believe in chemistry. Especially when I inject you with my neurotoxin so you can’t fight
back and then I can lay my eggs down your throat and turn you into a man slurpee.”
This excerpt comes from the very beginning of her profile, giving me the impression that not only is she very sexually active, she’s into being dominant, graphic, and open to almost anything if she’s comfortable enough with her partner. I’ll be honest; her photos gave me the preconceived notion that her written profile will parallel her photos with the dingy theme.
“Crushing souls…..when I am not feeding on them. They are delicious but if you put too much horse radish on them they will punish your bowels”
She’s a man-eater, well, at least self-proclaimed.
“Once my uncle told me he went to a slaughter house, punched a horse in the head knocking it out, used a pencil to puncture its neck, filled a cup of its blood then drank it, then fainted and when he came too, he said he saw the devil. Old people are really weird.”
Things are making a little bit more sense, now. With the possibility of being exposed to some trauma when she was younger, it could be linked to how she portrays herself, today.
“I earned the moniker of Captain AssRape.”
The icing on the cake. Is this really something to brag about?
Whether it is that she was the giver or the taker in this instance, this example of overcompensating for her insecurities was kept in the back of my mind before I approached with the opener.
“Please spell things CLOSE to how they sound in the English language. The use of letters and numbers as words should be reserved for 15 year old cheerleaders in a pregnancy pact”
Ahh. She wants someone educated to contact her. Granted, doesn’t everyone? Looks like I’m going to my opener/conversation (God willing) needs to be witty and with proper grammar.
Side note: yet another reference to 15-year-olds. What is going on? Did something happen to her when she was 15, and this is a subtle cry for help?
- What she’s used to:
- Poor grammar/punctuation, cowards who want their fantasies of being abused come to life, empty promises from males who will write things just to get any kind of acknowledgement, perverts who want to meet her intensity on the written level, disrespect from readers that think that’s what she’s looking for.
- What she’s not used to:
- Intelligent, witty, and respectful males who know how to talk to girls online, and turn dominant and dirty after trust is established.
After carefully reviewing her extensive and unorthodox profile, I decided that it was best to open with an approach that she’s never seen before.
“So far, I’ve counted two anti-15-year-old references. Should I be expecting any more by the time I get to the end of your profile?”
This line brings up possibility of her being boring, which she isn’t trying to represent. Granted, it leads to a risk of a “yes/no” answer, but I feel like it is more likely that teasing her will open up the conversation for more than a one-word-answer.
“Why are you so defensive? Are you 15 years old and/or a pedophile?”
“I don’t believe I’m defensive. (The irony of defending myself, the irony of defending myself, now). No. I’m far from 15, nor am I a pedophile. I tend to look for patterns; it can tell a lot about a person. That’s just one of the trends that I’ve found. Care for me to name more of those trends?”
At this point, we’re off to a good start with her response. Granted, her response is a little aggressive, but would I have expected anything less? I decide to hit her with another question that’ll hopefully make her act on her curiosity. I want her to respond. I want her to ask me what other trends are that I’ve found in her profile.
I’m also thinking there’s a possibility that nobody fully reads her profile:
- 1) It is too long and a reader can lose his attention
- 2) They’re so excited to get to the messaging as soon as possible
- 3) Who reads profiles, anyway? Bring on the photos!
Considering this possibility, she should become interested in the fact that I’m into her for her mind and not her body.
“Well, I mention your mom a whole lot, it is weird that you picked up more on 15 year olds.”
“Not necessarily my mom, but I like how you’re trying to include me in your profile and in your life. I’m not going to beat around the bush. I want your phone number. Are we ready for that, yet?”
Sheesh. This girl is relentless. Another personal attack on me. On the other hand, she would have just ignored me if she wasn’t interested. Right?
Considering my belief that she’s interested, I make an attempt at her phone number. This attempt incorporates a balance of getting right to the point, but getting her thoughts and making sure she’s comfortable.
“Are we ready for that, yet?” is a great question for me to ask. If she turns me down, I can tell her that I didn’t think we were ready, and I was checking. Then, I can quickly proceed to engage in more conversation.
“Whoa, slow down guy. Your mom ain’t special, sure when I give it to her hard the way she likes it, I have a connection, she talks about you being her little man when she is the small spoon, but she isn’t the only mom. SHE KNOWS WHAT THIS IS!!!!”
The deflection. Here, I choose to acknowledge her attempt at a graphic and offensive insult and be sure to give it right back. Respectfully.
The twist: I “neg” her. I execute a playful comeback that undermines her in a way that’ll make her juices flow even more. I’m thinking that she’s already riled up, so why not rile her up even a little more?
“And where will this date be? Cheerleading camp with your mom chaperoning?”
This is where it’s time to show my inner-alpha. She feels as if she’s been in control of the entire conversation; she’s used to that with other men. Little does she know, I’ve been in the driver’s seat the entire time. It was time for me to switch gears. It was time for me to put my foot down and let her know that I mean business. She doesn’t scare me.
“Here on the internet, things are going well for me. Your about to give me your number“
Shit. A spelling error (“your” instead of “you’re”)
Let’s hope she’s so caught up in this conversation that she won’t realise.
“I love drinks downtown. I also like dominant men. Call me at 517-265-5555”
Jordan at the buzzer.
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