Occupation: Marketing Director
Attractive Archetype: “Hipster Cool”, “World Traveler”
Occupation: HR Professional
Personality: “Career”, “Travel Addict”, “Cosmopolitan”
Pitchin’ ain’t easy.
For online dating email, there’s a subtle technique in knowing exactly the right time to go in for the kill. Wait too long, and the woman may have already moved on…show your hand too quickly, and well, that leaves her holding all the cards.
Take for example my latest correspondence with a TTG (Top Tier Girl) for a PDA member.
“Ok. Let’s say “Zombie Apocalypse 2014″ begins tomorrow–what’s the first thing you do to survive?”
“You can call me Jane 🙂 If ZA 2014 were to go down tomorrow, I’d rally my team, head to trader joes (obviously) and load up on grub and sail out to sea. Pretty sure those mangled humans can’t swim too well.”
Things start smoothly, and I’m feeling that I could score a Win. TTG was giving a few ‘textbook’ online flirting signals: from smiley-face emoji, to longer response, and suggesting I call her by her name.
Usually I can close just about anyone, given a great profile and enough time. But when it comes to SoCal yuppie types, they can be a bit more fickle then on the average.
“I like your style Sunshine. I’m thinking we cruise to Monaco, Wolf of Wall Street style.
California has completely ruined me. I don’t know about you, but I’m known to take time out from long lunches, and do actual advertising work on occasion.
Where were you when I needed a hot date who could also talk shop at my last mad men party…”
Granted we’re still on turn 2, but what she said in response prompted me to think I could skip a few moves…
“Hm, well i was probably plotting my escape for when the zombies come, but a mad men party sounds way more fun! What is your work? And do you actually act like the dudes from mad men?
I’m totally on board with your Monaco idea. I was there for the grand prix/cannes last year and i wouldn’t be mad about going back soon.
And what’s your favorite song to play on guitar/what kind do you have?”
Because this particular Member was crunched for time, and I was feeling confident, I pitched her on 3, hoping that a bolder move could help him stand-out from the rest of the pack.
“It may be the end of the world, but who says you can’t have fun and go out with a bang.
I play acoustic mostly, and I’d have to say it’s “Imagine” by John Lennon–do you play too?
Seems like you’ve got a good head on your shoulders. Maybe you and I should grab a nice cocktail and continue this conversation via rooftop lounge? (I don’t think the zombies can climb that high.)”
TTG and I had been pinging back-and-forth with an average of 30 minutes between messages. But after I’d sent the pitch—radio silence. Ugh. We all know the feeling.
You start second-guessing yourself, asking, “Maybe it was too soon?” If you’re anything like me, you then start obsessively checking for new messages with one eye on the clock.
Tick-tock, Tick-tock. Almost 2 hours later and still no response. What’s a PDA to do?
Follow-up, of course.
In an effort to recover, I sent this message about 12 hours later:
“Would be nice to get to know you :)”
Not too late as to loose all momentum, and not too short either. It would still give her just enough time to accept, in case she was still considering my offer.
“I love a rooftop lounge! That sounds fun, but this week is a little crazy for me at the moment. Maybe we can plan on something later for next week?
And do you by chance have a last name? You know, just to make sure you aren’t a murderer of some kind 🙂“
And with that, my client is back in the game!
Still, there’s work to be done. She’s now the one leading the conversation, and making the plans. She’s framed her time as more valuable. I’ve lost my position.
In my experience, cosmopolitan women respond well to subtle status cues. So to get back on track, I try to remind her in a funny way that I’m the prize.
“As chance would have it, I do have a last name. However, such insider information comes with 1 condition. You’re only allowed to stalk me 6 days per week, 15 hours per day.
Otherwise, next week will be tough. But for you I will try to make the stars align. What’s your number?”
So did I score the Win? Stay tuned to find out the results!
A holistic health enthusiast at heart, one time she drank only water for 21 days, just to see if she could.Thankfully for us, she survived.Today, Erika continues to provide that same level of dedication to all her members here at PDA.